By: Mia L. Hazlett
What do I hear when I hear my children play House and use their imaginations? I hear them use their imaginations when it comes to role-playing the man in their “house”. In my game, the man was an assumed role from my reality. My daughters use their imagination from an imagined hope rather than their reality. When it does find a way in, there is no man at all. If a man is lucky enough to make the casting call, it must be determined from the beginning if they are married or not. If they’re not married, the plot requires further detail, when do they see him?
I can’t change my children’s reality, any more than I can change my own. I’m at the point in raising them where I must create a level of normalcy with this new House game. My normalcy consisted of two parents, and the traditional role of man and woman, where the man did the manly stuff, but there was a transition taking place where the woman did the womanly stuff, while taking on some of the manly stuff as well. I’m not going to argue what “traditional” means, I’m sure it’s different for everyone and I don’t want this to turn into an argument of sexism.
Now the problem stems, the woman in my house, does the role of both the man and the woman, but my household stills requires the income of two roles. There is also a different perception of a single mother these days. Somehow, the single mother is consider the “Superwoman”, who can do any and everything. According the Huffington Post.com http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/17/gender-wage-gap_n_3941180.html the gender wage gap still exists, but I’m still not making this a sexist argument. My point is, women usually get physical custody in a divorce and then receive a stipend in the form of child support –for some- and they magically pull a life off for themselves and their children.
There used to be this image that the single mother, was a lowly, unemployed, unwed woman who could survive only on welfare. Now this single mother answers to the title, Business Owner, Vice-President, and Executive Assistant. These are just a few of the people I know and the titles they carry. People marvel at the incomes of this single mother, but ultimately if you were to split it in half, it’s just two average incomes, some well below average.
I guess my struggle comes with how I want my grandchildren to play House. Will there be no men? No marriage? Will there be kids? Or my biggest fear, will there be the game House?
© 2014 Mia L. Hazlett